June 2012
5 tags
cosmo tip #282
expertcosmotips:
fist his mom. fist. his. mom. FIST HIS MOM!! FIST HER!! FIST HIS FUCKING MOM YOU PIECE OF SHIT!! FIST HIS MOM!!
encasedwithinamber:
nerdsforthebirds:
neurophagy:
sonnetstockmar:
a bisexual pop group called Both Directions
a pansexual pop group called All Directions
an asexual pop group called No Directions
a gay pop group called Backstreet Boys
cosmo sex tip #563
conversationparade:
just as your partner’s about to come, press your thumb against their forehead and take away their bending
there are animals called dikdiks
pronounced.. dick-dicks?
no pronounced xylophone
cuntakinte:
do you ever see someone and think oh my god i would like to be responsible for your next orgasm
Lesbian alternatives to the phrase "Cockblock"
spenserisbearstuffs:
tarotcub:
mistergatsby:
herp:
selflubricate:
minkleburg:
1) Vagected 2) Twat swat 3) Clam jam 4) Clitorference 5) Beaver impeder 6) Taco blocko 7) Scissorception
this has been a post
stop the world i want to get off
Clitorference hahaha.
Taco Blocko… just one moment please… user has passed on from too much laughter
CLAM JAAAAAAMMMMMM
Woops.
imjustonekid:
Mom saw porn on the dash.
“Are those people’s butts??”
“Ohhh, it’s just my dash so I can’t control what people put on it…so it might’ve been.” (it was clearly butts)
“Well, you should put a message on there that says ‘no butts please’.”
OKAY. EVERYONE. NO BUTTS PLEASE.
NONE.
NO BUTTS.
neoputa:
i have unlimited texting and i only text 3 people ever i think my phone company looks at my bill and just laughs
shavingryansprivates:
anrdew:
cool ranch doritos
sex
what’s the difference
that’s right
there isn’t one
actually, andrew, sex is the physical act of the insertion of a male’s sexual organs into a woman’s, while cool ranch doritos are a flavored corn chip.
michaelceratops:
osointricate:
I wonder what President Lincoln would think about there being a movie about him killing vampires.
“whats a movie”
